I’ve been gone for a while.
Mostly school and work have taken up my time. Any updates I have is just me getting a break out in my face and I’m thinking it’s all the stress I’ve been under right now. Trying to figure out so many things for my future, making money, opening myself to relationships, having a tough time at work, making an enemy out of a co-worker, having back to back essays. Everything is just crazy. I try to chill, I try to go for a run, or work out to ease my stress. I’ve been taking more and more breaks instead of studying, but my stress gets worse when I procrastinate.
I miss tumblr, and I miss being able to have the freedom to do what I want and go where I want to go, but since I’ve got these new responsibilities, my transitioning to settle down for now is really hard. It’s like drinking really strong coffee, and expected to keep seated through your caffeinated jitters. It’s hard. I like to be on the go. I like to travel, and I like to know that I always have a home to come back to. But because it can’t always be that easy, because My parents are getting older, because no one can help me out anymore, I have to settle down and live life rather quietly and responsibly.
Trying to settle down is so hard.
There are surprising parallels between GamerGatorade and the “fake geek girls” thing. The “gamer” controversy is at its core a conflict between white cishet boys rabidly defending the industry’s status quo because it caters to them, and doing so by bitterly attacking those who enjoy the medium in different ways (indie game fans, hobbyist developers, people who analyse games as art and cultural products), with this latter group containing the largest representation of underprivileged groups who were shut out of the “mainstream”.
I mean, isn’t Zoe Quinn kind of the equivalent of a fanfic author getting recognition for her work? And aren’t the charges of her work not being “real games” incredibly familiar?
On all sides we see men angry that they are having to share cultural influence and dialogue space with others, and reacting in roughly the same way: by saying that everything outside their influence is not real, not authentic, not serious, not deserving. That fans of it aren’t real fans and creators of it not real creators, and any praise it receives is due to corruption, sexual favours, and political concerns.
And with video games they’re getting particularly violent and radical because it’s not working. The media, arbiters of traditional legitimacy, whether for profit or ethics are giving space to these Others. The power structure has betrayed them, they have been unjustly cast from power. They trusted these people to support their policy of dominance. And so they must be punished for their insolence and corruption. These are the “journalism ethics” they are talking about.